1. Studies have shown that wearing skirts is 90% effective in preventing VPL (visible panty line).

2. Ditto for "plumber’s butt," "whale tail," and "camel toe."

3. Ruffles on a skirt can be over-the-top glamorous. Ruffles on pants are only acceptable if your name is Mary, and a little lamb follows you everywhere you go.

4. It is impossible to smuggle someone in — or out — of prison, a masked ball, a hotel room, etc. by hiding them under your pants.

5. When you strap a gun to your thigh in pants, you lose the element of surprise.

6. You don’t have to have skirts hemmed differently for flats or heels.

7. Twirling in a pair of pants results in 87% less happiness.

8. Skirt blowing up, revealing underthings? Sexy. Pants falling down, revealing underthings? Humiliating.

Photograph by: E. Brown
Model: Jasmin Rodriguez